Journal

Stealing Wi-Fi

2012-05-26T06:55:14Z

Written and Directed by Tony Deyo and Andy Hendrickson

Starring: Andy Hendrickson, Nikki Glaser, Ryan Hamilton and Me (Sarah Tollemache)

Slice of Life: Yelling Small Talk

2012-05-08T21:29:32Z

This scene is to show the kind of interactions I have with my dad when I come to visit.

Int. Starbucks

Sarah

Weird!

Father

I'm sorry I didn't hear you. I'm getting old.

Sarah (yelling)

I SAID IT'S WEIRD! THEY USUALLY FILL MY COFFEE UP TO THE BRIM. IT'S LIKE THEY GAVE ME A TALL BUT IN A GRANDE CUP

Father

Oh. That's why I usually bring my own cup

Sarah

It looks like you got a lot of rain down here.

Father

I'm sorry. What?

Sarah (yelling)

IT LOOKS LIKE YOU GOT A LOT OF RAIN DOWN HERE IN KINGWOOD. ALL THE VEGETATION LOOKS ALL LUSH AND GREEN

Father

Oh yea. It rained non stop for two weeks. Your mom and I didn't have to water the garden for awhile which was nice.

Sarah

I noticed mom's copper pots look all shiny.

Father

What?

Sarah (yelling)

I NOTICED MOM'S COPPER POTS ARE LOOKING POLISHED. THEY'RE ALL SHINY. IT LOOKS GOOD. IT LOOKS LIKE MOM GOT SOME MORE COPPER POTS.

Father

You know your mother, always has to be cleaning something

Sarah (yelling)

SHE DID LIKE A CLEAN HOUSE

ext. of starbucks car Sarah and Dad are walking towards the car and get in

int. of car

Sarah (yelling)

YOUR CAR SMELLS SO NICE.

Father

Sarah, why are you yelling. Wow New York has made you a lot edgier.

(black out)

Alone in The Middle

2012-05-01T19:16:57Z

I was born into this world alone and I will probably die alone, but I also do a lot of alone in the middle as well like at Subway. I don't think I have ever eaten there with someone else. You probably still feel alone if you eat there with a companion. I like to sit outward facing the outside and just zone out while eating my sandwich. I don't even know why they put tables that fit more than one person. Subway should just have a row of single chairs facing a mirror so you can look at yourself while you eat by yourself. I do a lot of activities alone, like going to Radio Shack to get a USB chord for my printer or traveling to the airport and sitting on a bench that is not stable so everytime this lady in ill fitting sweatpants gets up to get something out of the vending machine I get jolted up like I'm on a seesaw and some dick kid just abruptly left while the song, She Works Hard For Her Money, plays in the background. Those are the little moments that make up life.

Another Way To Get To My Website

2012-04-24T01:34:54Z

The Trip: Daybreak

2012-04-12T20:45:27Z

Here's another clip from the movie, The Trip. I love this kind of comedy.

She Was Only 16 Years Old

2012-04-12T20:34:26Z

I love watching this scene from the movie, The Trip. My roommate and I thoroughly enjoyed this movie. Here is my favorite scene where the two main characters are doing their best Michael Caine Impressions, comic rivalry at its best.

Do What Siding

2012-04-10T20:59:26Z

Years ago my friend, Henry, brought to my attention that he can't stand it when people reply with the statement, "Do What?" if they don't hear or understand the question. Ever since he has mentioned it I have noticed it as well and now it bothers me. It makes people seem so stupid when they reply with, "Do what?" I mentioned this to my sister and she told me that our parents hate "Do What?" as well. My sister told me this time when she was having dinner with Mom and Dad and some telemarketer had called in the middle of dinner and my dad had answered with his thick South African accent so the telemarketer didn't understand what my dad said and replied with, "Do What?" My dad then pulls the phone away from his face turns to my mom and says, "Trina, this guy just said Do What." My mom then replies to my dad in her English accent, "Hang up the phone, Cedric." My dad then just hangs up the phone. I don't know why this makes my sister and I laugh so hard, but it inspired us to come up with the fatalistic company, Do What Siding, where they don't understand why people keep hanging up on them when they make cold calls.

Writing Session

2012-04-04T04:37:34Z

This Year's Christmas Cards

2012-04-03T01:43:25Z

I can't decide out of these two I should chose for my 2012 Christmas cards.

Slice of My Life

2012-04-02T23:50:28Z

Int. shot of hotel room. I'm lying next to a guy.

Guy

I loved being in my frat. We were like all the guys that got rejected from all the other frats. I ended up being president of my frat. I ended up throwing in this killer party where I hired a stripper that I found in from an ad that I sent out. This stripper ended up this porn star that all my frat brothers were obsessed about that summer. I had no idea who she was. I thought I was just hiring some stripper, so they freaked the fuck out when she arrived. They were like, Oh My God! I mean she did everything. Her pussy stunk. There was this one guy who we called Nasty John. He was eating her out in front of us and everybody was cheering him on. He pussy was so nasty and crusty, but he was so into it. They all thought I planned it. It was so cool.

That's crazy.

Guy

You can use that in your act if you'd like.

I don't know if people would believe I was a president of a fraternity in 1987